You’re Right, It’s Totally Unfair

“I don’t understand why God would take [insert the name/role of a person].  It’s just so unfair.”  If we’ve never uttered a similar statement, we’ve all heard it expressed.  We’ve probably heard it on multiple occasions.

This post isn’t the time or the place to delve into the theological depths of “did God take them, or did he allow them to be taken?”  There are plenty of other things we could consider as well, but someone more intelligent and more focused on that purpose can tackle those topics in their blog!

What makes death unfair, from our standpoint?  Is it that a person died “prematurely”?  Is it the circumstances in which they died?  Is it because he or she was such a good person?  [SEE LAST POST]  Is it nothing more than the adverse effect it has on us, emotionally or circumstantially?

If you’ve ever said or even thought that the death of a particular person was not fair, then let me agree with you 100%.  Death is completely totally wholly fully unfair.  TO GOD!

The gospel is the most beautiful story ever.  Somebody died in it.  The very singular person who did not deserve to die did just that, on behalf of everyone else who in fact did deserve to die.  That’s you.  And me.

When we consider the essence of the gospel, who are we to presume to think that our situation is “unfair”?  Life isn’t fair, we are unwise to expect fairness.  BUT, we don’t really want what’s fair.  We want preferential treatment for ourselves and our families.  If God was fair then he’d have snuffed all of us out a long time ago, even the best of us.  And we’d be in hell.  Who’s raising their hand to sign up for that?  Death isn’t fair, but we get the much better end of the deal (IF we acknowledge our sin condition and profess our faith in the one who died on our behalf).  That’s a bed of daffodils right there!

It can – and should – be a source of peace and hope when we realize God fully understand our pain because He knows how it feels.  Sin can’t be in God’s presence.  When Jesus became sin, a perfect and Holy God couldn’t look at that.  On the cross Jesus asked  the Father, “Why have you forsaken me?”  That was literal and not a rhetorical question.  God has felt the loss caused by death. God not only lost fellowship with humanity as a result of Adam’s & Eve’s disobedience in the garden, he experienced a separation from his own son when Jesus took our sin upon himself.  Our God can relate to us, He understands our pain and He cares.  More daffodils!

This current series of posts has been an effort to build a theological foundation on which to grieve.  We started by exploring that death isn’t natural, it goes against God’s original created order.  We were reminded that there are no exceptions, death has knocked and will knock on the doors of everyone’s house.  Death isn’t fair, but it’s unfair in a way completely opposite of how most of us normally think as we walk through our grief.  No blog can change tangibly anyone’s circumstances.  My prayer is that God might use these words to help even one person to gain a different perspective as they deal with those circumstances.

If there are specific questions or topics you’d like to see addressed in this forum, if you’re aware of folks with stories that would be a perfect fit for a “searching for daffodils” entry, if any words here have been a blessing to you . . . PLEASE LET ME KNOW!  You can leave a comment or e-mail me directly at  It’s a blessing to me to be able to interact with folks as a result of this effort.


One response

  1. At the moment I heard the doctor say that Donald, my husband, was dead; I experienced a bed of daffodils moment. I said, “I will see him again in heaven”. A year a half later I’m still saying the same thing. The hard part is that I have had to pull a lot of weeds from that bed of daffodils. I’ve also watered it often with my tears. But, I still cling to the belief that “I will see him again in heaven”. Now! that is a BIG bed of daffodils.
    Andy, thanks for your blog. May God prosper you in all ways for following His call.


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